welcome back!
how was your break?
happy new year!!
ahh, yes. the familiar sounds of the back to school blitz. pencil and paper. well, more like people and parties, especially as i enter what is to be the final semester of my college career. it's all old hat now, we've got this down. at this point, class is one of the further things from our mind, outweighed by future plans and current fun. the best four years of our life are winding down and we want to go out with a bang.
and, of course, we reflect.
have we spent our time wisely? i think high school burnt me out, being involved in far too much; so, college was an opportune time for a well-earned break. i was determined not to spread myself too thin and to cherish relationships above all else. now, though, i wonder if i've been as effective as i could have been. am i leaving carolina a better place than it was? it certainly has left me a changed woman, and i can only hope that i've made some sort of positive impact, be it with a professor, fellow student or within the context of an organization.
how important are the relationships i've focused my energy on, though? i love all of my friends so much, and i don't think that the time spent cultivating those relationships has been in vain. but is the context of a one-on-one relationship the best way to improve life- both mine and theirs? or should i have wiped some of that time out to dive into other things?
it's also interesting to see the dynamics of friendships change over the years. my friendships have always been my priority, and i have been the priority of these friends. but, as commonly occurs, the threat of an unknown and relatively unchartered future have left many scrambling to find partners of familiar backgrounds, leaving me as one of the very few singletons in my group. suddenly and without warning, i'm dropped several notches on the totem pole, for the significant other and their respective interests, friends and events. perhaps these friendships are more fleeting that i once believed; has my focus has been skewed for the past three and a half years?
i hope it's not too late. not too late to pour into what should have been a bigger priority all along. to, what i'm starting to see, will help in a way that will matter even after i leave.
leaving it changed.
here we go again. happy new year.
